Best Played (Salt Lake Pumas) Read online

  Of course, that was almost worse. Now, my family would be so much more disappointed when Olle and I had to ‘break up’ because they’d met him and liked him.

  Or was it if Olle and I had to break up? He had asked me out, after all.

  “If only boyfriends could be this easy for real,” I tried to tease.

  “Some are,” Lacey replied almost instantly. She and Will, they had something special. It hadn’t always been easy for them, but they’d figured out their differences and seemed really happy now. Having spent these past few days with Olle, I found myself wishing for that more and more.

  But could I really say that? At the end of the day, Olle was a fake boyfriend. And maybe he could be more. But, just as easily, maybe he couldn’t.

  My emotions bubbled more and more under the surface. It simply wasn’t something I’d know to anticipate. Sure, I’d always had a bit of a crush on Olle but that was as a celebrity, as something unattainable. To discover that he was even more attractive in person was almost overwhelming.

  “You’re being weirdly quiet,” Lacey informed me. “Are you sure everything’s okay?”

  And I wasn’t sure, but I couldn’t say that to Lacey. Not on the day of Rachel’s wedding. Maybe, when we got back to Salt Lake City, I could talk to her about it then.

  “It’s just… kind of a lot,” I said slowly. “You know, I never really thought before I started this that I was going to have to eventually tell my family that we’d broken up.”

  Lacey gave a soft ‘oh’ of understanding. “Somehow, that seems more deceptive,” I admitted. “Lying about being happy doesn’t really hurt them. But now they’ve met Olle, they’re going to miss him just as if he were my real boyfriend.”

  I had no doubt about that. Anyone who met Olle would miss him if he walked out of their lives.

  From the sympathetic noise that Lacey gave, I could tell that she understood at least that part of my worry. As my best friend, she got me. Still, there was some resistance within me that stopped me from telling her the whole story.

  I would, but just... not yet.

  Maybe it was a sort of hope that something would change, that when I did come to tell her there would be more to tell.

  “That does suck,” Lacey agreed. “I... probably should have thought of this when I suggested it. But you don’t have to tell them immediately. Like maybe in a few weeks’ time it’ll be easier.”

  I doubted it, but maybe Lacey was right. My head was full of Olle right now because I was always with him. Even if we were both talking to other people, I smiled at the sight of him. Right now, he wasn’t even in the house and I was still thinking about him!

  When I got back to Salt Lake City, my life would once again be full of other things. Even if Olle did take me skating, there was no way he could take up as much of my time as he was now.

  I felt a pang of loss somewhere near my heart, but I pushed it aside. Part of me didn’t want to see Olle less. It wasn’t a part that I could listen to. Not right now, anyway. It would be idiotic to let myself get invested before I even knew whether Olle was looking for a relationship.

  “You’re right,” I agreed. “Once I give everyone a few weeks to cool down, it’ll feel much easier.”

  After that, I let Lacey tell me all about what she and Will had been doing. I even asked after the Pumas, so that I could reassure Olle that he wasn’t missing any secret training sessions.

  He still wasn’t back from his run when Lacey and I hung up, so I took advantage of having the bedroom to myself to get showered and dressed in comfort. The photographer would arrive soon, wanting to get pictures of me and all the other bridesmaids as we fixed our hair and did our make-up.

  Excitement fizzed through me on Rachel’s behalf. I could hardly wait to see her, to squeal with her about her wedding day and all her hopes for the future.

  Chapter Twelve

  Olle

  I had only attended a couple of weddings. Whether it was because my friends just weren’t at a marrying age yet or what, I had no idea. None of the weddings I had been to had been in the US either, so it was a nice experience, to see how different it was.

  Going out for a run in the morning got me out of the way of any last-minute organization. After a quick shower and getting ready, I set off to find Roxi. The house was buzzing with activity. Even I was given a few tasks, which, at first, Mona was very apologetic about but quickly became just too stressed to care.

  While the stress was probably inevitable, it also turned out to be unnecessary. Rachel and Tim’s wedding went off without any trouble at all. She looked stunning and he looked like he’d won the lottery. It was sweet. As much as Roxi pretended not to have cried, she definitely did.

  Afterward, the reception was filled with delicious food and wine (so I was assured), conversation flowing. It was when the music started - after the official first dance was out of the way - that I held a hand out to Roxi.

  “Dance with me?” I asked. “I’m not very good,” I pre-warned. “But I enjoy dancing.”

  Roxi’s eyes narrowed for a moment, like she was searching for something in my face. I smiled, hoping to assure her that it was a genuine offer. As Rachel’s sibling, there was probably an expectation that Roxi dance, especially since she’d come to the wedding with a date. But that wasn’t why I had asked her.

  After a moment, my look must have convinced her because Roxi smiled. Taking my hand, she let me pull her up and onto the dancefloor among all the other couples.

  “I’m not very good either,” she assured me. “No practice.”

  “We can be bad together,” I promised, my hand easily settling against Roxi’s back as we moved into position. Neither of us really did much more than sway with the music, but it still felt nice. It wasn’t a very fast song and, thus, hardly a challenge for someone who didn’t dance much.

  Having Roxi close like this felt nice, too.

  It made me think back on our kiss at the barn. All the kisses in the barn. The way Roxi’s body had felt hot against mine. It was hard not to pull her in closer, but we probably should talk about it first. So far, we’d simply not had the time, with the wedding going on.

  But dancing like this, holding her close, I knew that I wouldn’t object to more kissing. “It’s been a great wedding,” I told Roxi almost conversationally. “Thank you for inviting me.” And sure, that wasn’t quite what had happened, but I still was enjoying myself.

  Roxi gave a little puff of a laugh. She was close enough that I could feel her breath against my skin, warm from her body in a way that made my mouth go dry. “Thank you for agreeing to come with me,” she retorted.

  As we turned slowly to the beat of the music, Roxi’s fingers gave my shoulder a gentle squeeze. “I guess, after this, I’ll owe you a favor,” she observed. “Though I can’t really imagine what an NHL player would need to call one in for.”

  “Water my plants when I’m out of town for away games? Check in on my house when I’m in Sweden?” I offered teasingly. “Very busy life of an NHL player.” That wasn’t actually inaccurate, work certainly kept me busy. But when your work was also your favorite hobby, it wasn’t all bad.

  Roxi laughed, but she also kept looking up at me with that watchful expression. It was like, after all these days telling me about her life and her family, she suddenly wanted to know all about mine. Not because she might be expected to know as my girlfriend, just because she was interested.

  That was how it seemed to me, anyway. And truthfully, it felt kind of nice.

  “Do you find the NHL everything you hoped it would be?” Roxi asked. “Are there challenges that you didn’t know about when you were looking at it from the outside?”

  The question made me think. Were there challenges I hadn’t expected? The truth was that now, after having done it for so long, things were easier. When I’d first started out... my head hadn’t been in the right place for it.

  But those weren’t memories I wanted to rehash. Especially not no
w. Not when I could focus on the way Roxi’s body felt against mine.

  “Work comes first,” I shrugged. “I guess, I always expected that to be the case, but it’s often a challenge to remember to take a day off.” That was definitely true, I had a tendency to focus on things too much. A common problem goalies experienced, I supposed.

  Roxi was quiet for a moment, her head down to watch our feet so that we didn’t trip over each other. When she glanced back up at me, her eyes looked troubled.

  “Don’t you find that hard?” she asked. “Don’t you want to have a day off to do something other than hockey?”

  “Well, not really,” I chuckled. “I love hockey.” And that was true. Yes, I took days off and I knew why that was important. But I had to force myself to do so; it wasn’t something that’d come to me naturally unless I insisted. Rest was integral to good performance, I knew that.

  Trying to think of a comparison, I gave a small hum. “If you could ride horses every day, do you think you’d want to have a day off?”

  “Yes,” Roxi answered, without even a pause for thought. “I like variety. I wouldn’t want to do the same thing every day, even if it was something that I loved.”

  I shook my head. It was so different from my way of approaching life. I wanted as much hockey as I could get, not to try something different.

  “But, as long as it makes you happy,” Roxi went on to add, making me grin. Hockey made me happier than anything! “You look like it does,” she added, giggling.

  Laughing, I shrugged. “As long as there’s hockey, I’m happy,” I confirmed. That was the great thing about your job being something you loved, about it being a hobby as much as a job. Hockey was in many ways my life and I didn’t think that was a bad thing.

  A new song came on, this one much faster, making me take a step back. Roxi and I could dance more, but perhaps the closeness we’d experience with a slower song wasn’t as appropriate now.

  “Come on, show me what you got,” I encouraged, jokingly, before proceeding to dance ridiculously. It made Roxi laugh and that, I realized, was truly the point.

  We danced a bit more and then I danced with both of Roxi’s sisters and a couple of cousins, too. By the time I got to sit down, I could feel my muscles aching in response. It wasn’t bad, though! Everyone was having fun and it was hard not to enjoy that.

  My thanks for being invited had been sincere. Yes, we had an agreement, I pretended to be Roxi’s boyfriend, but that didn’t mean I didn’t also enjoy this. Tennessee, or perhaps the vineyard specifically, was everything Roxi had promised. Her family, too, were very nice.

  It did make me feel a little guilty - lying to them. But the more time I spent with Roxi, the more I kind of began to hope that maybe this didn’t have to be a fake-forever kind of thing.

  The way Steph had said Roxi didn’t have boyfriends played on my mind. She had kissed me back, but that was hardly an indication that she wanted to date me. If Roxi didn’t want a boyfriend - and after all, wasn’t that the whole point of me being here? - then why would she want to date me?

  Yet, despite knowing that, I found it hard not to let my heart run away with thoughts of her. The way she smiled, the way she lit up when she liked something, the way she scrunched her nose up when she didn’t. My head felt full of Roxi.

  “I think there isn’t a single Parker girl you haven’t danced at this wedding with,” Roxi’s dad teased me as he sat down in the chair to my left.

  Chuckling, I shook my head. “Well, they’re all just such great dancers, how could I not?”

  He smiled, pride obvious on his face. “And there’ll be more of this to look forward to,” he observed. “Maybe not right away, but I don’t expect Rachel’s to be the last wedding I watch my daughters dancing at.”

  Mona was dancing with Tim, letting him lead her into some pretty impressive spins. Both Emmet and I chuckled, even if I was secretly a little envious of Tim’s skills. He was a much better dancer than I was.

  “How have you enjoyed your first visit?” Emmet asked me. “I worry that we’ve all been too busy with the wedding to welcome you properly.”

  “Not at all.” I shook my head, assuring Emmet. “I mean, I knew I was coming to a wedding, that involves a lot of organization, so no need to apologize or anything.” Which was certainly true. As for whether I had enjoyed my visit, I could give a very honest answer to that.

  “It’s been really nice,” I promised. “Roxi talked this place up a lot and it has lived up to every expectation I had. More so! I’ve been very lucky to be allowed to join you on this occasion.” And if I didn’t think about it too much then I didn’t feel too bad about lying to everyone.

  Emmet nodded, shifting in his chair so he could look at me rather than watching the dancing. His eyes were almost the exact same shade as Roxi’s, which made the piercing look he was giving me feel all the more familiar.

  My heart kicked up a rhythm in my chest as anxiety snaked through me. Were Roxi and I about to be unmasked? That would be truly awkward on this day of all days.

  “It’s good to see Roxi with someone so important to her,” Emmet said, making my eyes widen in surprise. “She’s always found it harder to let people in than her sisters, I don’t know why. She needs a young man like you. Somebody principled, who isn’t going to betray that trust.”

  While I had no intention of betraying Roxi, the words did twist in my stomach. This was very much the ‘dad’ talk. The ‘don’t hurt her’ talk. It wasn’t one I had had before, but it wasn’t exactly difficult to imagine why Emmet felt the need to have it. He wanted the best for Roxi; I totally got that.

  Still, it felt a little intimidating.

  “I have no intention of betraying Roxi’s trust, sir,” I told him, doing my best to sound as sincere as I could. At least Emmet thought me principled, which was nice.

  “I know that,” Emmet replied. “If I thought you intended to hurt her, we’d be having a very different conversation.” While his tone was dark, there was humor glinting in his eyes. I gave an uneasy chuckle in return.

  As I swallowed, Emmet continued, “Roxi needs someone steady. Someone to be her rock. She’s like her mother, she has a tendency to take on too much without recognizing it.”

  Even from the small glimpse I’d had of Mona organizing this wedding, I could see how that might be true.

  “Obviously, we’re always going to be here for her. But knowing she’s got someone in her corner in Salt Lake will make me sleep a lot better.”

  As Emmet spoke, I realized just how much I wanted that, too. I wanted Roxi to have someone in her corner, to look out for her, to support her. But more than that, I wanted that someone to be me. I wanted to see the way she got excited about things, the way she smiled, I wanted to be the one to make her laugh.

  Could I be steady for her? Would she even want me to? I had no idea.

  In many ways, I wasn’t sure I’d ever been steady for anyone but the Pumas.

  Swallowing, I nodded. “I want that, too,” I told Emmet. “But I think we both know that at the end of the day, it’s Roxi’s choice.” My tone was teasing and so was the comment, but there was definitely truth there.

  Roxi would be the one who chose. I could only hope that maybe she chose me for real.

  He laughed. “That’s true enough,” he agreed. “She’s always known her own mind. Wanted to be a cowboy when she was a kid, until she got to college and discovered all the different things she could do in a city!”

  It made me smile, the obvious love Emmet had for his daughter. It made me want to be that steady man for Roxi, if that was even something that she wanted.

  Granted, if you asked my ex-girlfriends, ‘steady’ wasn’t a word they would have described me with. But I pushed aside the worries about whether I could do it. For now, all that mattered was that I wanted to.

  Emmet gave me a genuine grin. “Don’t worry too much about what she’ll choose,” he advised. “She brought you out here to meet us. I don’t
think she would’ve done that if she wasn’t serious about you.”

  Except that wasn’t true.

  But Emmet was the last person I’d admit that to. Roxi and I were in this together, whatever this ended up being. Being her fake boyfriend was something that I’d agreed to, but Emmet’s words just made me wonder even more if Roxi would even want something real.

  Getting a fake boyfriend had been very much so she didn’t feel the pressure to bring home a real one. In some ways, it was difficult not to wonder if I’d actually made it worse. Could being too nice make it worse?

  Not that those were things I could ask Emmet either.

  So instead, I gave him another wide smile. “I’m sure that whatever she chooses, it will be something Roxi wants,” I commented. It was easy to say because it was true. I just hoped that maybe she’d consider choosing me.

  Chapter Thirteen

  Roxi

  It always made me sad to fly away from my family after a vacation spent with them. But preparing to return to Salt Lake City after the wedding was more difficult than I could have imagined. Guilt about the lies I would have to tell my family in the near future soured in my stomach.

  Not only that, but this was the end of Olle pretending to be my boyfriend. I made sure to make the most of our last evening together, giving him such adoring looks across the coffee table that my family probably thought we were on the verge of a proposal.

  As we checked-in at Nashville Airport, it cheered me up slightly to think that we weren’t going to go back to when I’d been just a fan and Olle hadn’t even known my name.

  This time, he would definitely remember me!

  But I still wondered whether he would want to see me again. When he’d talked about work coming first, I’d realized that Olle probably didn’t have time to date. And it didn’t sound like he was all that interested in changing it, either.